7 Ways to Parent Without Stereotypes

Long before becoming a parent, I became fascinated with messages society sends to kids solely based on their sex.  As a college student with a major in Communications and a minor in Women’s Studies, my favorite class was “Gender in the Media” – a perfect combination of the two. My thesis focused on Halloween costumes for children and the wildly different messages they send to kids depending on their gender.

Even though I didn’t have kids yet, my mouth hung agape as I scanned the girls’ costumes: mostly service/ helping professions and princesses; many overly-sexualized for a six year-old. The boys costumes were overwhelmingly first responders (police, fire fighters), violent figures (ninjas, etc.), and the ghoulish variety. After almost 15 years, I don’t think much has changed. We’ve just added new princesses for girls and new superheroes for boys.

Some people might say, but does it really matter? It’s just a costume. It’s pretend.

But I strongly believe they DO matter.

Tons of messages infiltrate children’s lives every day about their abilities, skills, and potential, based upon their gender. Movies, television shows, toys, books, games, clothes, advertisements, and more.

But there are more subtle messages, too.  And these come from inside the home. The way we speak to kids from birth, how we discipline them, how we respond to their feelings, what activities we offer, and the careers and professions to which we encourage them.

For example, researchers at the University of Delaware found that mothers speak more to their boys about numbers than they do with their girls. Parents tend to buy more math and science-related toys, books, and games for their sons.  And more importantly, researchers from Penn State and the University of Michigan found that parents’ stereotypes, especially by fathers, about girls’ math abilities had a strong impact on children’s interest in math.

Math is just one example, and our implicit biases about gender impact many other ways by which we parent. Most of us don’t intend to limit our children.  But we all have unconscious bias, based on our life experiences. How can we overcome that and parent our children to their full potential?

I’m thrilled to announce a free mini e-book, 7 Easy Ways to Parent Without Stereotypes. It includes a printable checklist to sum up the contents and help you remember the tactics each day.

GET YOUR FREE COPY HERE, and please comment below with your thoughts!

I look forward to hearing ways that you put these ideas into action.